We all manipulate sometimes in our lives. Why? Because it’s how we get what we want, and it’s not necessarily malicious. This can range from dressing well to create a positive first impression to putting someone down to lower their self-esteem and make them dependent.
But what if you’re the one asking yourself, “Am I manipulative?” It might be time to check in with the “Am I manipulative?” quiz.
Some types of manipulation can harm both the manipulator and the victim. It can damage relationships, erode trust, and lead to resentment and feeling guilty.
This is where the “Am I manipulative?” quiz can be helpful. It can be a valuable tool for identifying unconscious patterns in your behavior. Ready to start? Let’s go.
Take the “Am I manipulative?” free quiz
Okay, let’s examine the basics of passing the “Am I manipulative?” quiz.
Here is what you need to do:
- Find a calm place where you can be alone with your thoughts and free from distractions.
- Try to relax your body and mind, as it’s essential to understand the specifics of each question of the “Am I manipulative?” test.
- Use pen and paper to record the answers. Answer each question honestly. Be truthful about your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. There’s no right or wrong answer, as the goal is self-reflection.
- Don’t overanalyze or overthink. Just trust your initial gut feeling when answering the “Am I a manipulative person?” quiz.
- Gather points for every question answered, see your final score, and check the results.
Let’s begin!
- You want to borrow your friend’s car. How do you approach them?
- Directly ask if you can borrow their car (1 point)
- Hint that you need a ride and see if they offer their car (2 points)
- Mention how much you love their car and how convenient it would be to have one (3 points)
- When arguing with someone, you:
- Specifically address the issue at hand (1 point)
- Bring up past mistakes or shortcomings of the other person (3 points)
- Play the victim to try to gain sympathy (2 points)
- You want a promotion at work. How do you approach your boss?
- Clearly outline your accomplishments and reasons for deserving a promotion (1 point)
- Emphasize the difficulties you’ve faced and how hard you’ve worked (2 points)
- Mention how underappreciated or underpaid you feel and how much more you could do with a promotion (3 points)
- Your friend is struggling with a problem. How do you respond?
- Offer support and advice (1 point)
- Talk about a hardship you endured to show how you relate(2 points)
- Focus on how their problem is affecting you (3 points)
- When someone compliments you, you:
- Thank them, and appreciate the compliment (1 point)
- Downplay the compliment or change the subject (2 points)
- Criticize yourself, hoping they will praise you again (3 points)
- You’re trying to convince someone to do something. You:
- Present the facts and explain the benefits. (1 point)
- Appeal to their emotions or sense of guilt. (3 points)
- Use flattery or charm to persuade them. (2 points)
- When faced with criticism, you:
- Listen to the feedback and consider making changes. (1 point)
- Become defensive and blame others. (3 points)
- Use the criticism as an opportunity to shift the focus to someone else’s mistakes. (2 points)
- You often find yourself:
- Putting the needs of others before your own. (2 points)
- Taking advantage of others to get what you want. (3 points)
- Balancing your own needs with the needs of others. (1 point)
- How would you describe your overall approach to relationships?
- Honest, open, and respectful. (1 point)
- Focused on getting what you want, even if it means bending the truth. (3 points)
- Charming, persuasive, and people-oriented. (2 points)
Results of “Am I manipulative?” quiz
Alright, let’s break down your score and see how manipulative you might be.
- 9-17 points: There is a low possibility that you are manipulative. You generally have healthy communication and interpersonal skills. You likely value open and honest communication and respect the feelings of others.
- 18-23 points: In this case, you are likely to be manipulative, but it’s not a dominant part of your personality. This could be due to various factors, such as insecurity, fear of rejection, or a lack of assertiveness.
Pay attention to your thoughts and behaviors to identify when you might be manipulative.
Try to be more aware of how your actions make others feel, and work on building genuine connections.
- 24-27 points: You are most likely to be manipulative and potentially harmful in any relationship. But remember, a positive result does not constitute professional help.
It might be helpful to think about why you do it. Is it to get your way? To avoid conflict? Something else?
You may ask, “What do I do if I find myself manipulative?” This is what Nicole Arzt, LMFT, says:
Please note: This questionnaire is for informational purposes only and should not be considered a substitute for professional mental health evaluation.
Self-exploration can be a significant step in maintaining mental well-being. But if you have concerns, seeking guidance from a qualified mental health professional is essential.
Before taking the “Am I manipulative?” test assessment, there are some valid questions to answer.
If I’m not sure whether I’m manipulative or not, can I take this quiz?
Absolutely. The purpose of the test is to provide information and self-reflection. It’s designed to help you understand potential manipulative behaviors in yourself.
Even if you’re unsure about your own behavior, taking the “Am I a manipulative person?” test might offer insights and starting points for self-awareness.
Can I trust the “Am I manipulative” quiz?
While this test is not a substitute for professional assessment, it can provide general insights that may give you an idea about your behaviors.
Also, if you feel you require further evaluation, you can always discuss the results of this quiz with your therapist to receive a definitive diagnosis and understand the next steps.
“Am I manipulative?” quiz: FAQ
What is manipulation?
Manipulation is the act of deliberately influencing or controlling someone or something to your advantage, often without their knowledge or consent.
It’s a form of social influence that involves using subtle or underhanded tactics to achieve personal goals at the expense of others.
Why am I manipulative?
People manipulate others for various reasons, often from a desire for personal gain or control.
Nicole Arzt, LMFT, adds, “If you were modeled manipulation in early relationships, it may have been normalized to you. You may struggle to know how to relate to others without using these tactics.”
There are some answers to “Why am I a manipulative person?”:
- Past trauma. In some cases, manipulation can be a learned behavior developed as a coping mechanism for childhood trauma, including emotional neglect, emotional abuse, or other harmful experiences.
- You might be manipulative if you have low self-esteem. Some people manipulate to compensate for feelings of inadequacy, seeking external validation and control to boost their self-image.
- Fear and insecurity. Manipulation can be a defense mechanism used by those who feel threatened or vulnerable, allowing them to feel safe.
- Narcissistic tendencies. People with narcissistic traits may manipulate others to serve their own needs and maintain a positive self-image.
Can manipulators change?
Peopel can people can change, but it takes time. You may benefit from seeking therapy to help you become the person you want to be. It’s important to prioritize your own well-being and safety.
