How to Be an Adult: Practical Steps Toward Personal Growth

You’re going to become or already are an adult in terms of age. You can purchase alcohol, move to another country, join the military forces, or have a child. Nevertheless, these opportunities aren’t the only thing that comes with being an adult.

It’s also about maturity, the ability to handle your responsibilities, and a different approach to the world in general. Let’s explore what sets people who feel stuck in their childhood apart from real adults and how to step into a new role confidently.

Emotional intelligence is an undeniable part of being an adult. Find out how well you understand your feelings and those of others and get science-backed tips on how to improve your EI.

The real meaning of the “adult” adjective and how it is connected to maturity

This adjective was borrowed from Latin “adultus” — a past participle that means “grown.” At the same time, Merriam-Webster dictionary defines the word ‘adult’ as “fully developed and mature.” In general, society might call anyone who has reached the age of legal majority an adult. However, this isn’t completely accurate.

86% of parents of young adults say they did at least a fair amount to prepare their children to be independent adults. [1] Still, many people entering adulthood might not be ready enough. They need to do household chores, build relationships with others, balance career and personal life, etc.

A responsible adult is someone who can look after themselves and manage all aspects of their life independently. It isn’t only about age but also about mindset, skills, and experience.

How a young adult can feel more in control of their life

While entering adulthood may bring some anxiety and a lack of understanding of what comes next, this article can help you feel more empowered. Follow these simple tips to start building a foundation for your independent life.

1. Take full responsibility

One of the main differences between adults and adolescents is that fully developed people don’t rely on someone to handle their problems. This is all about mindset: at an earlier age, your parents were more accessible. Now you need to gain a sense of self-responsibility.

Of course, it doesn’t mean that you need to refuse support, or feel “If I won’t do it alone, there’s no one to help me.” Still, turning your problems into others’ problems is a bad idea. Taking care of your own stuff will make you feel empowered.

2. Learn to manage your finances

One thing a young person needs to remember is that money matters. Your family (if they aren’t super-rich) probably won’t cover your financial needs forever. Thus, it’s time to take charge.

Improve financial literacy

According to the Cambridge Dictionary’s definition, financial literacy is ‘the ability to understand basic principles of business and finance.’ While not all people will run their own businesses, being able to organize money to pay rent, buy food, or purchase clothes is essential. As such, it’s better to find out more about taxes, budgeting, debt management, insurance, retirement planning, etc.

Establish a good credit score

Having a good score means that you can manage your finances wisely and be a trustworthy borrower. To do it, follow a few simple tips:

• Pay bills on time. This will let you avoid late fees and keep your credit score healthy. If you’re afraid of forgetting to do it, it might be necessary to set automatic payments.

• Use no more than 30% of the total credit limit. Spending too much can also negatively influence your score and lead to an inability to cover these expenses. Thus, you’re better off avoiding overspending.

• Avoid taking unnecessary debts. Don’t borrow money unless you need to and know you can pay it back.

• Build a long credit history. To show the bank that you’re a reliable borrower, it’s better to keep old accounts open.

• Check your credit reports for errors regularly. If some errors occur, it can negatively influence your score. So, it’s better to be attentive. 

Ensure that your spending habits align with your actual income. A good credit score comes from consistent, responsible actions over time. So, it’s better to treat credit as a tool, not free money.

Save for the future

Having a job is great, but to feel sure that everything will be fine, whatever happens, it’s better to have savings. You can create an investment fund for retirement and set up an emergency fund to cover at least a few months of expenses. There are ways to make this process simpler:

• Automate savings. Set up automatic transfers to a certain account that will happen without your needing to think about it.

• Start small. It might be challenging to start setting aside a large amount of money at once. You can begin from a few percent of your income and increase this amount gradually.

• Use separate accounts. Keep savings for the future away from the money you spend on daily needs. It might be a bit easier to stay disciplined when you don’t see this money as readily available.

• Revise your plans regularly. A good point is to accept that any salary rises and additional income sources can help you save more. If something like that happens, you’d better revise your plan and optimize it.

3. Build a career

Going to work and having job-connected responsibilities is another aspect of adulthood. It doesn’t mean that you need to work 24/7 or focus only on your career without any hobbies. However, it means that you need to approach tasks seriously.

Unlike students, who may forget about the assignment, mature adults need to take ownership of their work. Building a career is also about seeking opportunities for professional growth and improving both hard and soft skills.

On the other hand, you can start a business. Entrepreneurship can become a powerful step on your journey, but it may also bring a lot of challenges. So, ensure you’re ready to handle responsibility, learn about financial management and law, as well as deal with the fact that everything can go wrong anytime.

4. Focus on personal growth

Adulthood also brings many opportunities to grow into a better, more interesting, and open-minded person. When you’re mature, you focus on ways to overcome psychological roadblocks and childhood traumas and become a better version of yourself.

Breeze can become your first step toward maturing. Engage in self-discovery with science-backed tests on various topics from charisma level to attachment style and personality type. Find out who you are, discover ways to develop your strengths, and address weaknesses.

Improve time-management skills

When you’re younger, you can act more carelessly, be late for school, or skip tasks without significant consequences. But in adulthood, time management becomes more important. Save some tips:

• Write to-do lists. The human mind can easily forget things and get distracted. The easiest way to avoid this is to keep everything you need to do written. 

• Prioritize tasks. Being responsible doesn’t mean handling everything at once. Do the most urgent or vital tasks first and then focus on others later.

• Delegate. You don’t need to carry everything on your own. Sometimes it’s better to delegate some tasks: ask your parents and relatives for help, share responsibility with your colleagues, etc. 

• Use habit trackers and helpful apps. You can try Breeze — an all-in-one tool that allows you to build new habits easily and without feeling overwhelmed. It helps you stay consistent and integrate new routines into daily life.

Try Breeze

Overcome imposter syndrome

In most cases, confidence can boost your performance and open up new opportunities. Yet, many people grow up with insecurity and self-doubt. To overcome these in adulthood, you can try to create an evidence journal:

• Take a notebook or an app
• Write down 3 achievements you’ve accomplished today
• At the end of each week, review your notes to see the evidence of your growth

Alternatively, you can try using a gratitude journal from Breeze. It allows you to track what you’re grateful for right on the spot and provides the right questions to make you feel valued. 

Also, take Breeze’s imposter syndrome test to understand your current situation better and get free tools to feel more confident. Everything is supported by science-backed insights and tips.

5. Learn to be an adult child for your parents

Traditions about relationships between parents and their adult children vary in different cultures. In general, according to the research, more and more young adults live with their parents, which is especially true for the unemployed and those without permanent employment. [2]

Living with parents might be a way out for some people, yet it should still involve becoming self-reliant and establishing boundaries (aka beginning to separate from the family). To speed up this process, you might need to move out of the house and become financially independent. Maturity means balancing respect and gratitude while also being able to make your own decisions and focus on your future.

6. Pay attention to your physical well-being

Adulthood is about being able to stay responsible for whatever happens to you. Staying fit and healthy means that you can take care of your body and don’t need another adult to tell you what to eat and when to go to sleep.

Exercise and stay active

You don’t necessarily need to begin every morning by visiting the gym for hours. Yet, the study published in the International Journal of Health Medicine and Sports says that consistent physical activity significantly reduces the risk of chronic diseases. [3]

Thus, it’s better to engage in physical activity for at least 300 minutes per week (or about 43 minutes a day) [4] to avoid weight gain, take care of mental health, and transition your mind from stressful thoughts to a more balanced state. Save some ideas to do it almost effortlessly:

• Take a walk to work, a cafe, or wherever you’re used to going by transport.
• Turn on your favorite music and dance for a few minutes.
• Do light stretching exercises during work breaks.
• Plan weekend activities that involve movement.

Ensure you eat nutritious food

While adolescents may choose processed food and eat without any foresight, fully developed adults should approach their eating habits more seriously. In particular, you can:

• Prioritize whole foods like vegetables, fruits, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats.
• Plan your meals to include balanced nutrients that fuel your body and mind.
• Avoid excessive sugar and processed snacks.
• Limit eating late at night to support digestion and sleep quality.

Sometimes, unhealthy eating habits can signal deeper challenges like eating disorders. These can involve restrictive eating, bingeing, or an unhealthy obsession with food and body image. If you notice persistent anxiety, rapid changes in weight, or feelings of shame related to food, it’s important to seek professional support.

Get enough sleep

Once you reach the age of 18, researchers recommend sleeping 7+ hours every night. [3] While this tip might seem obvious, it’s also about maturity, as you learn to prioritize yourself. If you wake up tired or feel restless overnight, follow these tips:

• Limit screen time at least an hour before bed. Blue light from the screens tells your body that it’s still daytime. If you avoid them before going to bed, it will let your body produce melatonin, the hormone that positively influences the sleep-wake cycle.

• Avoid naps longer than 20 minutes during the day. It will let you avoid disorientation and feel much better upon waking, as naps for short periods typically stay in lighter stages of sleep.

• Create a relaxing bedtime routine. You can do a short meditation, take a warm bath, listen to calming music, or read a light book. This will let you lower cortisol levels and calm down before sleep.

• Avoid caffeine and heavy meals in the evening. They stimulate the nervous system, which can significantly influence the quality of sleep and make you feel unfocused in the morning.

• Make your bedroom cool, dark, and quiet. Sleeping in a slightly cooler temperature helps your body regulate its natural sleep cycle, while darkness signals your brain to produce more melatonin.

Avoid unhealthy habits

Not all adults follow this tip. Yet, maturity involves understanding that short-term pleasures might have long-term consequences. As such, it’s better to avoid smoking, excessive alcohol consumption, and other behaviors that can negatively influence your mental and physical health. Instead, if you need to get your life together, you can try the following:

• Manage stress through journaling and mindfulness.
• Set personal boundaries to avoid burnout.
• Support overall body functions by staying hydrated and eating nutritious food.
• Keep regular health check-ups even when everything feels fine.

7. Take care of your mental well-being

Learning to live in society and supporting your psychological wellness are undeniable parts of becoming an adult. These involve the following:

Improve emotional intelligence

While children might ignore others’ needs, act selfishly, or react without thinking, emotionally mature adults learn to care about the humans around them. The best thing you can do for yourself is to work on your emotional intelligence: learn to be more empathetic, understand how people around you feel, and respond thoughtfully. Here’s some advice that can be helpful:

• Track your mood with Breeze’s tracker and understand how different situations influence your inner balance. Over time, you’ll be able to avoid specific triggers or overcome them more effectively as you’ll be ready for them to appear.

• Pause before answering to analyze what you’re going to say. This will let you avoid harsh reactions, reduce misunderstandings, and give a better response.

• Appreciate that people don’t always behave as you expected. Unmet expectations about others’ behavior can make you feel disappointed pretty often. Instead, it’s better to avoid assuming how someone “should” act and focus on understanding their perspective. 

• Accept others’ feelings without judgment. You’ve never been in someone else’s shoes, so it doesn’t make sense to judge them. On the other hand, you can always choose what’s good for you and set boundaries for people with different values and mindsets.

Be a good friend

According to a review of 38 studies, adult friendships significantly predict well-being and can protect against mental health issues. [5] Nurturing long-term friendships and relationships directly stems from a person’s emotional intelligence, which supports the previous point. 

We have the article on how to make friends as an adult, and here are some valuable pieces of advice:

• Meet your friends’ friends. If your close ones like these people, maybe you’ll like them too. You can ask your friends to take you out with their friend group or even host a party. This is a great way to expand your social circle, especially if you don’t feel shy.

• Try group classes. These can be dancing classes, art classes, or cooking workshops, etc. Joining such activities will let you meet new people who have similar hobbies.

• Volunteer your time. This tip works similarly to the previous one. Volunteering lets you meet those with clear values and kind hearts.

• Take a solo trip. It can work out especially if you’re quite extroverted. During solo travels, you can get to know people from all over the globe in hostels, group hostels, or local events. It might be stepping out of your comfort zone, which will help you learn more about yourself and the world we live in.

• Text people you’ve communicated with before. These can be school friends, former colleagues, etc. You already know these people, and you have something in common. Thus, it might be easier to find a common language and rebuild a connection.

Besides making new connections, it’s vital to be a good friend. Here are some tips from our article:

• Communicate openly about your feelings. If something goes wrong, it’s better to discuss everything on the spot than handle conflicts later. Sincerity is the best foundation for long and resilient friendships.

• Find possibilities to help them grow. Getting better together and encouraging each other to reach more is a powerful way to strengthen your friendship. You can celebrate your close ones’ wins together and provide a helping hand when something goes wrong.

• Respect others’ boundaries. All of us can have secrets, things we don’t like, and preferences. Accept that your friends have different personalities; they won’t always do what you want, and can have different opinions.

Learn how to love

A lot of adults seek a partner or any other form of romantic connection in their lives. Whether you want to get married and create a family, or simply look for someone to share your time, thoughts, and experiences, it’s important to stay open about your intentions. 

Here are some ideas on how to build trustworthy relationships based on mutual trust and respect:

• Don’t let your past influence your present. If you live with childhood trauma, it may be helpful to visit a psychologist and get the necessary treatment to avoid past wounds shaping your current choices. You can also take Breeze’s trauma test to discover whether early experiences may still be affecting your emotional patterns.

• Learn more about your attachment style. Living with an insecure attachment can lead to certain challenges in relationships with others. As a mature adult, you may need to spot this pattern and make conscious efforts to grow beyond it.

• Discover your love languages. All people approach love and connection differently, and what makes great sense for one person can be unnoticed by another. Thus, it’s better to understand what’s valuable to you and identify the primary love languages of your partner to make sure you provide love in the way they need.

8. Learn more about sexuality and your body

While the age of consent in most states ranges from 16 to 18, before reaching this age, children typically already know some basic information about sexuality

When becoming an adult, you need to truly understand how your body works, what healthy sexuality looks like, and how to protect your physical and emotional well-being. Please pay attention to these topics to protect yourself from risky behavior:

• Consent. Always ensure that any sexual activity is mutually agreed upon and respected.

• STI prevention. Find out how to protect yourself and your partner from infections.

• Contraception. Read more about methods to prevent unwanted pregnancies and how to use them.

• Anatomy. Learn how both male and female body works so you can better understand how to take care of your health and avoid surprises.

• Emotional readiness. Analyze your feelings to be sure you’re ready for the emotional aspects of sexual relationships.

• Boundaries. Discover your personal limits and how to communicate them clearly to others.

• Media vs. reality. Recognize that what you see in the media often exaggerates or misrepresents real sexual experiences.

9. Learn how to manage daily chores 

An adult is a person who can not only overcome challenges but also organize their daily life most comfortably and effectively. Some are taught to do this as children, but if you don’t have some of the necessary skills, it’s time to learn them now. 

• Cooking your meals
• Keeping your apartment clean
• Doing laundry properly
• Organizing your workspace
• Planning your weekly routine
• Paying for rent and utility bills on time

For example, you can ask your parents, close relatives, or even more experienced friends to explain to you how to do the following. YouTube videos can also be rather helpful. Finally, you can create a routine plan, break big tasks into daily habits, and stick to the steps to gradually build skills and confidence.

Tips for a young person from the book by David Richo

There’s a book by a psychotherapist, teacher, and retreat leader, David Richo, PhD, named “How to Be an Adult: A Handbook for Psychological and Spiritual Integration.” If you opened this article looking for some tips from it, we’ve got you covered.

We think that these suggestions, in addition to the ones above that are useful for most adults, are worth thinking about.

Practice mindful presence

Mindfulness means being here and now. No matter whether you’re talking to a friend, working, or attending an important conference, staying present helps you deepen your connection to others. Even more, scientists state that mindfulness allows people to reduce emotional reactivity and improve behavioral regulation. [6]

If you’re interested in becoming more mindful, try Breeze’s relaxation games. They let you concentrate on what’s happening here and now while training your attention and calming your nervous system.

Take responsibility for your feelings

All emotions matter, and feeling anything is OK. Instead of blaming yourself or others for anger, anxiety, or sadness, try to understand where they come from. Maybe there are signs of the problems you try to ignore. Approaching feelings seriously and thoughtfully makes you a real adult.

Nurture your inner child

When becoming an adult, you can meet your childhood needs that weren’t fulfilled by your parents. Healing can take some time and effort, but remember that now you’re the one responsible for your life. 

For example, if you grew up feeling unnoticed, it’s a sign that now you need to provide yourself attention you lacked. Journal your thoughts, speak kindly to yourself when you’re upset, or talk to a friend who truly listens. Remember that your feelings matter at every age, and your inner child needs love, care, and acceptance.

Sources

1. Pew Research Center. “Survey of U.S. young adults and survey of U.S. parents of young adults.” 2023
2. Sompolska-Rzechuła, Agnieszka & Kurdyś-Kujawska, Agnieszka. (2022). “Generation of Young Adults Living with Their Parents in European Union Countries.” Sustainability. 
3. Kalfin, Kalfin & Yuningsih, Siti & Prabowo, Agung. (2024). “Significant Positive Impact of Regular Exercise on Mental and Physical Health.” International Journal of Health, Medicine, and Sports
4. Watson NF, Badr MS, Belenky G, Bliwise DL, Buxton OM, Buysse D, Dinges DF, Gangwisch J, Grandner MA, Kushida C, Malhotra RK, Martin JL, Patel SR, Quan SF, Tasali E. “Recommended Amount of Sleep for a Healthy Adult: A Joint Consensus Statement of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine and Sleep Research Society.” Sleep. 2015
5. Christos Pezirkianidis, Evangelia Galanaki, Georgia Raftopoulou, Despina Moraitou, Anastassios Stalikas. “Adult friendship and wellbeing: A systematic review with practical implications.” Frontiers in Psychology. 2023
6. Keng SL, Smoski MJ, Robins CJ. “Effects of mindfulness on psychological health: a review of empirical studies.” Clin Psychol Rev. 2011